funny duck jokes
Q: At what time does a duck wake up?
A: At the quack of dawn.
Q: What do you call a cat that swallows a duck?
A: A duck-filled-fatty-pus
Q: Did you hear about the duck with a drug problem?
A: He was a quackhead.
Q: What do you call a duck that steals?
A: A robber ducky.
Q: What did Detective Duck say to his partner?
A: “Let’s quack this case!”
Q: What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?
A: “I hope I didn’t quack any!”
Q: What did the duck say when the waitress came?
A: Put it on my bill!
Q: What did the blonde replace her rooster with a duck?
Q: What do you get when a duck bends over?
A: It’s Buttquack
Q: Why are ducks bad drivers?
A: Their windshields are qwacked.
Q: How do ducks talk?
A: They don’t You Quack.
Q: Did you hear about the duck who thought he was a squirrel?
A: It was one tough nut to quack.
Q: Did you hear about the bird that couldn’t pass environmental legislation?
A: He was a lame duck.
Q: What do ducks get after they eat?
A: A bill!
Q: What happens when a duck flies upside down? A: It quacks up
Q: What do you call a duck on drugs?
A: a quackhead
Q: Where did the duck go when he was sick?
A: To the ducktor!
Q: How do you make a duck sing soul music?
A: Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
Q: Why don`t ducks tell jokes when they fly?
A: Because they would quack up!
Q: What did the drug diller say to the duck?
A: Are you on quack?
Q: Why was the teacher annoyed with the duck?
A: Because he wouldn’t quit quackin’ jokes!
Q: What does a duck get after he eats?
A: A bill
Q: What do ducks have with soup?
Q: What do ducks watch on TV?
Q: What do you call a duck with fangs?
A: Count Duckula!
Q: What do you get when you put four ducks in a box?
A: A box of quackers!
Q: What happens when Donald Duck flies upside down?
A: He quacks up!
Q: What is a chick’s favorite drink?
Q: Did you hear about the prostitute that thought she was a duck?
A: She charged 7 dollars a quack.
Q: What did the duck eat for snack?
A: Salted Quackers!
Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: Because there was a quack in the sidewalk.
Q: Why did the duck go to the bank?
A: Because he wanted to get a new bill.
Q: What do get if you cross a duck and Santa?
A: A Christmas Quacker.